Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
You stole a frozen pizza from the freezer, stuffed it in the back of your shirt then proceeded to leave the party.
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
1. so the new neighbor u called dibs on.. I'm sorry..but not really. 2. She lactates, I guess that happens when you have a kid less then 5 months ago.... WTF!! 3. Is it fucked up I'm craving Ceral & Milk now?
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
Randomize
