there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
Randomize
