i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
Lock the bathroom door next time you are going to masterbate with the shower head, okay?
I was just power-washing my vagina.
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
I share a birthday weekend with Easter this year, so that fucking sucks. I hate sharing...and I have to share with fucking Jesus this year.\n
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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