Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
Dude, this is like the 4th time today I've had to use cruise control for a 25mph zone. This hangover is never fucking gonna end.
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
You can't just leave with hair like that
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
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