just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
He poured syrup on all those broken dishes because "syrup is magical, and by the time we wake up, they'll be fixed."
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
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