I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
I just made my bed perfectly before realizing that I'll be too drunk to appreciate it tonight
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
just like fucking own it. stare that cop in the eye and just keep masturbating "yeah motherfucker Im high as shit and this feels great"
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
this morning's inventory: a top hat, two empty bottles of everclear, half a slim jim, cigars, tiara, pot necklace, and some fishnets. and that's just my purse.
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
