I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
You work out of a Hotel?
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
Randomize