theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
Everyone is slow dancing to Aerosmith. I am serenading a slice of pizza.
We broke up in downtown Nashville with drunken, blow up penis waving bachelorette parties walking by. For some reason I can see this ending up as a country music video.
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
Randomize