Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
Boobs are out for the taking
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
LinkedIn just suggested I might know the guy I caught my wife fucking.
So I have to send you an email about my weekend, heretofore referred to as The Perfect Weekend. Wherein I have lots of awesome sex with a guy with THE MOST AMAZING BODY.
I look forward to this email. I will respond with, Condoms and Creepers: The Adventures of Online Dating.
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
Randomize
