I can't watch pbs sober anymore
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
Got myself invited to boss's family dinner party, drank too much, and fucked boss's brother in his parent's house. Just another Wednesday.
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
Welp. It's confirmed. There is literally no lube on this entire island. Fuck me. More accurately, don't fuck me.
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
Randomize
