your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
Randomize
