This girl is more easily done than said...
I was looking through my facebook friends list to see how many ppl on the list i've hooked up with, and was effectively reminded of my failed friendships, relationships, fuck budy-ships, friends with benefits, and "i cant remember if i ever did shit with him but we're awkward now" ships.
And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
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