I'm laying in your front yard are you home
just heard 2 nerds making fun of a girl for mispronouncing stochiometry. they followed it up by discussing the mathematical equation for getting laid. my day just became 100x better.
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
Randomize
