Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
Now that I'm single, I like to think of myself as in a relationship with Taco Bell.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
Just walked into the supermarket puking into a plastic bag while wearing my favorite Bob Ross shirt. I am a human disaster.
Randomize
