Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
I can't sleep so instead I'm thinking of all the things I would love to do to you right now
That's weird, I usually just count sheep
the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
You got ahold of his prescription papers and gave out prescriptions for cranberry and vodka
Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
Randomize
