Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
i permit you to call me
Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
so he stopped for a second, looked up at me and said in a really creepy voice, "I can has cheeseburger?" and then went back to eating me out.
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
I did it again.
I drunk texted John McCain.
ok first of all what the fuck
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
Randomize
