I didn't shave. On purpose
There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
Today has been the most awkward masturbatory day of my life. Possibly even more awkward than when my mom found my vibrator on Mother's Day.
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
Randomize
