It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
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