Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
Um, you were throwing up the shocker symbol in front of all of the wedding guests during the best man's speech. No wonder the groom thinks we're bad
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
Randomize