census says that i am hotter than the girl you just left with...sad for you
I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
I feel compelled to tell you that I woke up this morning and found an entire corn on the cob in my purse. Ive decided not to question my drunken behavior anymore, and to just accept it as my lifestyle.
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
It's rum buckets o'clock
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
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