I want to stick my p in your. b.
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
Dude, you got arrested and then texted 911 to tell them you'd been kidnapped with a screenshot of your current location.
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
Randomize
