I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
that's an acceptable place to lick
Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
Dude. He only had one testicle. It was like his whole package was a Muppet Show character coming at me.
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Randomize
