He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
Just did a line with a monopoly bill. Tell me I'm not fancy.
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
Apparently HR frowns upon current employees introducing themselves to the new employee as "Hi I'm sleeping with your cousin"
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
Randomize
