Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
I don't do stupid things anymore. I do stupid people.
why did i save someone in my phone as corn dildo?
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
I drunk dialed my ex-boyfriend last night. He was sitting next to my new boyfriend. Shoot me in the face.
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
