Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
What's everyones problem with my costume?!
It looks like a unicorn came on your face.
just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
FUCK WHALES
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
Randomize
