I like my sex mixed with concussions.
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
She's walking around topless with a bottle of red wine, crying and singing showtune ballads. This is actually an improvement.
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
Randomize
