These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
Note to self: trying to grow pubes back = worst decision of 2014 thus far
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
Randomize
