Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
I should just wear a shirt that says "Im Sorry" on the front because the second we land in Vegas, I'm going to be a fuckin trainwreck.
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
I bought you a small gift as a preemptive apology for being a drunken slut tonight.
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
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