at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
On Tinder, guy asked me if I had ever been fucked by a Pokemon master. Needless to say I didn't respond.
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
Randomize
