He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
Can I sleep on your couch? My wife just found my eHarmony account.
boyfriend # 1 is in the bathroom and boyfriend # 2 is ringing the doorbell need back up this is not a drill i repeat this is not a drill
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
Why is there a business card for people who need bail bonds in my wallet...
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
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