do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
I dont have enough money in my bank account to buy a pregnancy test. this wouldnt be the first time ive had to steal one either...
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
Randomize
