dude I went to cubs game with my mustache, aviators, and a hooded sweatshirt. Do you think it was irony or fate that there were four 17 year old girls in front of us?
I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
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