I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
Who wrote Most Moistest Dad on my chest and what the fuck does it mean?!?
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
I think the cop who arrested me yesterday is at my gym rn should I say hi
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
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