I look better un-naked...
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
Randomize
