and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
With a stable of 7 fuck buddies, I literally use a random number generator to determine the order in which I will booty call them on my way home from work. I have not slept in my own bed in a month. I just keep half my clothes hanging in my car or in a suitcase.
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
Should I put the spider I likely swallowed in my sleep into my calorie tracker?
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
