..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
She pulled up to the bar in a limo, wasted, and alone. Gets out, shrugs and slurs "I couldn't find a cab" and proceeds to take a shot.
I'm in love.
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
Randomize