am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
Dude, you were so drunk last night that when we went into subway, you forgot the word for bread.
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
Randomize
