I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
Maybe it’s too soon to casually tell the boss that I went to Tulsa for some dick last night
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