we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
Dude you make losing your phone an art. You left it balancing on a two liter bottle in the kitchen. Wtf
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
Dude, this is like the 4th time today I've had to use cruise control for a 25mph zone. This hangover is never fucking gonna end.
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
Some mornings I close deals. Other mornings I puke out my window while I’m driving down the highway
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