Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
i was hoping the water fountain would somehow shoot out vodka this morning
She guessed my name 9 times, and 5 of those times she guessed Mike. Figured that'd be an easy target for the night.
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
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