this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
Okay I woke up in my room, snuggie on, had a water bottle in my hand my tv was on Disney channel and my cigarettes are gone. And I deleted every text in my phone but one that said 'you are absolutely welcome'
he asked my vagina if she was excited to meet Leonard. LEONARD. His fuckin penis is named Leonard.
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
I've thrown up twice at work. Just casually, in the mop sink. Then continued to make someone a milkshake. Want some ice cream?
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
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