You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
Do you know how easy it would be to shoplift if I was a magician?!
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
Randomize
