I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
I swear I was in Legend of Zelda Twilight Princess and American Ninja Warrior at the same time. I'm never getting high while rock climbing again.
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
I have peed in a lot of sinks
Randomize
