Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
mmmm my 21st bday fucking sucks all my best friends are pregnant...selfish assholes. they just couldnt wait til after my bday.
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
the bright side of moving is at least my Tinder options will refresh
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
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