There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
are you excited because you wanna see me or because you wanna get laid?
bc i get to see you. naked.
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
I'm lying topless with an eye infection at the foot of my bed with a dog between my legs. With disney in the background. Its one of those 3 am moments
Went to an open-bar law school party and puked in front of Justice Scalia. My legal career is now complete -- I literally got judged by a U.S. Supreme Court Justice. Can't get any higher than that.
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
Randomize
