There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
You tipped the Uber driver extra for taking your phone away while you were drunk texting
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
Randomize
