The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
Randomize
