Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize
