So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
I have the worst farts today, I'm walking by the cubicles of people I don't like and leaving them surprises. Brb.
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
What happened last night? I just woke up and there's like 15 mcflurry cups on the floor
You don't remember stealing them?
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
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