Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
You hit on the cop telling him you were celebrating the anniversary of your 21st birthday and ur boob job... That's how he got ur #
ah tequila...
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
He ran over from the bar to give me more singles because the stripper was doing gymnastics on me. He is a really great friend, just probably not the best boyfriend.
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
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