the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
It's 4:30 AM and I just walked through a line of 10 deer without them freaking out. I am the campus deer king.
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
Randomize
